I haven't been posting as often lately--or maybe it just feels like there has been more time in between posts. Part of that might be because school has ended and I am craving relaxation now that it's summer. Maybe it's because work has been busier than ever and pretty stressful the past couple weeks. Or perhaps it's just a normal lull of sorts.
Anytime it's been a few days since my last post, the need to write another is in the back of my mind (even though I love writing). It's kind of like the piles of papers I need to clean up, the laundry I need to fold, the pictures I need to hang on the walls, the clothes I need to put away, the errands I need to run. There is always a to-do list, something else I feel like I should be doing.
But while those tasks are hanging over my head, I'm not truly in the moment. I'm not focusing on the present.
A similar thing happens when I think about the future. On a small scale, I sometimes get so anxious thinking about the week ahead, I can't truly enjoy my Sunday. Or on a larger scale, I dream about what's going to happen in a few months, next year, a couple years from now. I plan out where I want to be, how I envision my life and family and career someday down the line.
But at the same time, all that thinking about the future can make it tough to treasure all the wonderful things I experience in my life now. It's hard to understand how I get from here to that point in the future. It's overwhelming to think of the time, the uncertainty, and all the little steps I will take before my life becomes the one I see in my future.
What does that mean now? What does that mean for my today? I can't discount the amazing aspects of my daily life. I can't forget to be grateful for the small things in life... and the big things... that I sometimes take for granted. Even when the to-do lists are never-ending and the goals I have set seem unattainable, my life right now holds so much happiness. I just need to remember to take a moment, recognize the good things, and thank God for all I have.
Thanks for the honest post and the reminder to enjoy the present. I also get anxious on Sundays, sometimes in the morning before I've even gone to Mass. I know I'm not as present or focused as I could be. But then I hear this part of the Communion rite: "Deliver us, Lord, from every evil, and grant us peace in our day. In your mercy keep us free from sin and protect us from all anxiety as we wait in joyful hope for the coming of our Savior, Jesus Christ."
ReplyDeleteI know there is a deeper meaning, but hearing the priest ask for peace and protection from anxiety helps me overcome my pre-work stress.
On a lighter note, great dress! And where was that picture taken?
Thanks, Cathy! It's true, sometimes just asking for a little help can make all the difference. I actually did that during Mass on Sunday - simply praying "help me through this week" - and felt a peace come over me.
ReplyDeleteThe dress is from good ol' Forever 21 last year - wore it for the first time in Hawaii on our honeymoon. I realized I should have noted where the picture was taken :) We were on the rooftop deck of my friend's parents' condo building downtown a couple weeks ago. Had a great view of the Hancock building and Navy Pier!
Totally with you today - feels like my brain is on that futile hamster wheel of "what next?" and I don't feel like I'm getting anywhere, but when I stop and look around, I really am happy with where I'm at. Thanks for a heartfelt post. :)
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